Life lessons learned in Bali and how I stopped my negative spiral before it got the best of me.

negative spiral, love, happiness, reversing a bad moodI wanted to take a moment and express how blessed I feel. As some of you know, I have had a really rough few days and in some ways feel as though I may have hit rock bottom. I am learning so much about myself, my strengths, my weaknesses and my values while I am in Bali. I have been struggling with determining my direction in my business and my life and one thing that Bali will do is truly have you face these questions head on. It is the one place where one cannot blame the weather, the stress, pissed off people, high paced life or any other inconvenience for one’s bad mood or sadness. Bali simply is a beautiful place with beautiful, patient people and an amazing array of affordable spa services, raw food and juice bars, yoga studios galore and amazing weather. All of your excuses are stripped away and you are faced with the core of your problem or situation. I have been in Bali for a little over one month and I have experienced a great deal and met some truly inspirational people. What I did not expect was feeling as though I have taken 10 steps backwards in my business.

I became a health coach because I truly believe in the power of whole foods and mindfulness as a vehicle to living a life full of happiness, freedom of choice and vibrancy. I did not fully expect the emotional growth and test that it would put on myself. I have been faced with 100s of opinions on how I should gain more clients, get the word out there and promote myself. It is overwhelming to say the least. I have learned that when I am faced with uncertainty, I become paralyzed. I then start questioning my ability to provide value, I question my passion and worst of all I question my self-worth. My logical side of my brain knows that this thinking is nonsense. I have been passionate about health and wellness for many years. I am a voracious reader and researcher and have read as much as I can get my hands on health, wellness, whole foods, intuitive eating, mindfulness, meditation and financial mindset. For some reason, this all goes out the window when I experience a set back. If I am not careful, I can end up in a negative spiral and get myself in a serious ball of nerves. I reached that point a couple of days ago. I share this with you because I believe that we have all been there in some capacity; however, it is rarely talked about. For those of you who can relate to this, just know that you are not alone. You are not crazy and in many ways, you are feeling your truth and experiencing an amazing breakthrough. I want to share with you what I do to help get myself out of a negative spiral and turn myself back onto the road of forward motion.

  1. Look at my list of needs and determine if they have been met. For me, the list is as follows:
    – Water (have I had enough that day)
    – Food (have I eaten in the last few hours)
    – Exercise/yoga (have I done that today)
    – Meditation (have I done at least 10 minutes of meditation)
    – Journaling (have I sat down and just laid all of my complaints/frustrations out on paper)
    – If any of the above has not been completed for the day, I drop everything and make sure that I take care of these core needs. Exercise can be as little as 7 minutes with the 7 minute workout. Meditation can be as little as 10 minutes with 1 Giant Mind app. If you have a bit longer, I love this 30 minute meditation that was first introduced to me by Amanda Daley. These needs can all be met in as little as 30 minutes. There is no reason for me not to get off my butt and do them if I am feeling incredibly low.
  2. If I am still feeling anxious, depressed or just plain bad after the above has been done, I check in with myself. What makes me happy? What would make me proud today? This is different for everyone. For me, I realized that I had not knit a stitch since I had set foot in Bali. As many of you know, that is a sure sign of depression right there. I picked up my needles, some yarn and my pattern and set out for a cafe. I found a cafe in the center of Ubud called Mingle. As I got set up, a woman next to me let out a short cry of joy and asked what I was making. I looked over and she had a crochet project with several colors of yarn on the table. We ended up sitting next to one another for several hours and had our own Balinese Stitch ’N Bitch.
    Bali Stitch 'N Bitch

    Bali Stitch ‘N Bitch

  3. Still feeling the blues? Think of something else that just lets your mind wander. Maybe it is a TV show, a good book, a walk in the park. Choose something that will allow your brain to rest. For me at this moment, I knew that some juicy TV drama would do the trick. I decided to go to Hubud (a co-working space) and download a couple of episodes of Humans and brought them back to my villa. I set up myself with my knitting and some tea and watched an episode and let my brain completely wander. I got throughly sucked into the show. **Disclaimer – I am now harping on getting back to Hubud to download more episodes. Choose your show carefully. 😉
  4. If all else fails, be grateful for this feeling and just let it be. Give it attention. Focus on how the anxiety feels, looks and where it is in your body. Close your eyes and just focus on it. Caress it. Give it love. Be happy for where you are. Be grateful for what you have. But never settle for where you are. It will pass and you will be a better version of yourself.

I am now sitting in Clear Cafe overlooking an amazing jungle view and smells of incense is gently wafting through the air. After many days of tears, angst, anxiety and frustration I finally am beginning to feel myself move forward. I can truly be grateful of my amazing fortune to be sitting in this cafe and being able to write this blog post. I know that I will hit another roadblock as all of us do, but I am hoping that I will now have this blog post to remind myself what action steps to take so that I can allow my body to process, breathe, heal and continue to move forward.

Clear Cafe View

Clear Cafe View

I hope that this helps someone out there who may be hurting, frustrated, stressed or just sad. You are not alone. Take my hand and lets get you back on the road towards happiness and success. We all deserve it. Much love to you all.

xo, Amber

PS – stay tuned for an update on the direction that I am going as I continue to discover how I can best add value to my clients, fellow entrepreneurs and you, my dear readers. I am super excited about where this beautiful life is taking me and I hope that you will join me on this adventure. <3

 

About The Author

Amber Dugger

Hi! My name is Amber Dugger and I am a location independent online business owner. I am a certified mastery level Profit First Professional, hold degrees in International Business and Finance, and am also a certified Health Coach (INHC). I combine a holistic approach with practical action steps to get my clients set up for financial success and most importantly, sustainability. My clients leave knowing how to bring in money, how much money they want and a simple and effective system in place that allows them to know what to do with their money once they have it.

Blog Comments

With my little chick so far from home right now, I admit that I’m a little worried but I am confident in your ability to figure it out. I and many others who love you will be there for you no matter how it all shakes out. I think that is the hardest thing with kids and others that one loves because one just wants to fix it but knows that one can’t. I look forward to future posts.

I am grateful to hear your story. I will refer to this post often.

Love

Lynn

gteat read..thank you so much for the insights!

Great advice, It sounds like you are figuring things out. Glad you took some time to meet your creative needs via stitching.

Thank you for sharing this, Amber! Excellent strategies and such a heartfelt message, as always. Sending you light and love, xoxo.

Great post Amber! Can totally relate to this-have felt this way many times. You are right-it’s all part of the journey. Wonderful to be on this journey with you-you have so much to give the world. Love and blessings to you Xox

Thanks for sharing Amber. I have been through the same in the last few days – and it got to the point where I couldn’t breathe – and didn’t sleep for about 3 nights in a row. I asked my higher self what it needed and it said: cuddles. So I found a lovely friend who cuddles me for hours. So grateful. And the journey continues.

Hi Chelle! Thanks so much for your feedback. I am so happy you found a way to get through the tougher times. I keep telling myself, one step in front of the other! Sending much love to you, Chelle! <3

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your blog and definitely will come back sometime soon.
I want to encourage continue your great posts, have a nice morning!

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